A Deliberate Vagueness

A Deliberate Vagueness

 

I am not saying that the storm of the century that occurred this last weekend had any measurable effect on me.  Not like I checked the measuring stick and I had accumulated another two inches.  There is something wonderful about the white-stuff accumulating, and the ordinary drabness of my surroundings being covered up, even if we can also anticipate a meltdown and that mess of circumstances that depressed me in the first place, returning. 

 Has been a while since I have blogged, and see a pattern of doing it once a month.  Pay the rent.  Once a month.  Take out the garbage, and that should be a daily task, but am waiting for the snow to go away, so that I can make my way to the alley.  In some ways, I am being deliberately vague about some things.  Why would a couple of inches or wait are we in the 13 inch range now, impact little old me?  

Don’t think so.  Not important.  Avoid details.

 

Seems there is a certain degree of exaggeration when it comes to expectations and then the reality of delivery and what actually found its way to me.  Having said that, it seems it is over before I can get a measurement that convinces me, this really did happen.  The scope of it all was truly enormous.  And still I am deliberately vague.

Not sure if it is stupor or a fog that comes with the falling snow.  White-Out and I find myself inside,  and suddenly blogging, because I can and because I have time on my hands.  Regular exercise is postponed.  Best to recover slowly and venture out later, when the uncertainty has passed and nobody seems to care that the white stuff has turned to slush and is what it is, and about all that is a deliberate vagueness, which is my blog topic for today.

 

I have myself suspended in a mystical state of debrief, as I ask, but come up with no answer, “Did this really happen?”   Based on my past performance, I may have another month or more to come up with a satisfactory explanation as to why any of this is important.  Winter happens each year.  In Los Angles 13 inches might happen on the Hollywood Movie Screen, but in real life we tend to be content with the national average.  Give or take 2 inches and we can manage.  Rain.  Snow.  Something else, and this is where I keep a deliberate vagueness in mind.

Imaginative suggestion, and have decided this is what I have become accustomed to because of the digital nature of the news and weather and sports.  Fact checking might happen, but before it does and reaches me in any significant proportion, such that the impact is measurable, the act or event is over.  Obsolete or melted before I can decide for myself how often I should expose myself to all of this.

Not sure why any of this has taken over and made my blog space.  Certainly it is not that I have lost interest.  Stamina being what it is,  I can understand the hesitation that I display, when others say,  “This is the big one.”  And again I am being cautious with a deliberate vagueness and missing a step or two when I tell myself, “It is okay if you are disappointed.”    Not sure if I have decided or things just happen and I learn to live with it.  But in this modern period I find myself lacking conviction and incentive to blog more,  enjoy more, or even do more.  Once a month.  Twice a week.  Three times a day.  Frequency and duration and wonder if it matters to spell it out the specific activity and specific requirement of what is the makeup of  the perfect snowfall or storm or personal experience forecast-ed to happen .

 

Seems it is over before I can actually get a grip, balance myself on slippery ground, and embrace the moment for better or worse.  To make it worse, it seems it happened everywhere I was not, and I seeing pictures and hearing the stories that are out there.  Storm of the Century  and just a few days ago I was concerned.  But not now, and for reasons I will not  repeat  I will voice a certain frustration and disappointment that you were able to experience that 13 inches or more, while I had to settle for the normal amount or none at all.

Happens when we live local and interact globally or at a distance greater than our immediate self and place of being.  Local and global and in some ways I am tired of hearing about all of this, when it seems to pass me by and leaves me wanting.  Wanting what you have, and when it comes down to details there is a deliberate vagueness as to what I mean.  Local and Global and one step removed from the everyday me, and this has me thinking.  “Should I blog more or less.  Will it help?”