KILLING TIME

KILLING TIME

 

Before I go very far, I need to give credit where credit is due.  Went out this week and came home with 10 books.  Today’s blog is based on opening the cover page and looking at the table of contents from this book:  Houses Of The World.  Author:  Francisco Asensio Cerver.  Published by:  Konemann, 2000.  So I don’t think I will get sued if I continue writing a blog inspired by a book I brought home from the thrift store.  Seems good show-and-tell-books are all becoming digital, and dragging home a heavy book full of pictures is happening less and less.  Even so, I wanted to set up a thinking and writing studio un my kitchen and use the hours I have to stimulate and increase the capacity of my mind.  And as a derived benefit, be aware what one must do to keep up in today’s environment.  Not sure I will ever figure out what I must do to keep up, but I do know my blog for today is:  Killing Time.  And that says a lot about being retired, and waiting for the Blue Angles Naval Flight Team to fly over my house.  So now we begin, best I can.

 

Killing time, but don’t want a lot of problems to come my way because I am fixated on expanding the mind, and reading, then turning that event into something that makes me feel better.  Must say, this idea of houses came when I could not sleep the other night, and laid in bed at 3 am trying to mentally construct a simple building.  Just visualization, and I realized I better stop what I was doing, as I am not a builder, nor architect and have no ability to draw or even remember faces.  So I designate myself a wanna-be-builder of a shack in the woods, where I can go to be out of the city.  Of course,  I don’t want to pay somebody to build this place for me.  So part of bringing home a book about houses, had to do with actualizing my night vision by  looking at the color pictures in this book.  And that did serve a purpose.  Each picture lists the architect that conceived the building pictured.

So here I am killing time, and have a book of houses pictured on the table in front of me.  So decided to use this as a starting point.  What harm or what good could come from looking at a book, then using the new computer station with 3 to 4 screens of information available to me at the same time?  I do know even in the early stages of this process and experiment, that all of this is a departure from my normal blogs, where I take on the surreal narrative and direct myself through a self-constructed maze, and come to some conclusion at the end of the blog.   Distraction and being disorganized and incoherent could be one side effect from what I am doing.  If so, stop reading now, and go play with the dog.

Have one hour and then will saddle up and go outside.  Summer and it will be hot today, so logic dictates that if you don’t have to be at work and inside with the air conditioned desk and work space, one should go outside, and enjoy just being out and about.  Is what I will be doing in about one hour.  Walk and pass this as exercise and an enhancement to the new me and my writing studio life.

 

Not sure when I am out, that I will concentrate on the urban architecture and modern buildings towering over me, as I make my way up one hill and down another.  Will just do as I often do, with or with being under the influence of a new book or a new look, I will assume a brand of innocence that I have acquired once reaching retirement status.  Old or Young, innocence is a recognizable thing, and will give more importance to this that the buildings I am passing by.

 

Already I am pleased with myself and what I am doing here.  Taking practical information from looking at a book, and then going online, use one reference name or point to acquire more information.  I didn’t want to concentrate on the work of one particular architect because of the first essay I was reading in the thrift store book.  Didn’t want to get tangled up with extending my knowledge at a novice level and then amplifying all of this in a blog.  Instead I just wanted to increase the capacity of my mind, kill some time, and try to keep up with those I might run into, while out exercising and walking in the neighborhood.

But writing and reading and killing time might be an acquired taste.  Which me to wanting to tell you,  that tomorrow or at some point, I will be blogging about Must-Visit-Destinations, places that I have been or want to go to, as in fulfilling my bucket list.  And also have a few cookbooks I carried home.  So on the subject of being inspired by a book, am quite unaware as this blog proceeds, how this will influence me and my blogging style in the coming weeks.

Keep your blog short.  Try to be interesting.  And so I have reached that point where I must stop.  Even as I feel I could go on and on,  I don’t wish to do that.  Killing time is good.  And now I have done that.  Will format this and picture this, and prepare for an afternoon walk, into the heat of the concrete jungle where I live out the day and engage with self and words and become a bundle of joy, when possible.  Taking my water bottle and dressing light, will try to blend in with the maddening crowd, make my way to nowhere particular and at the end of it all, pat myself on the back for not being arrested, and for not agitating people too busy for what I have to offer on this hot summer day.

 

Tis all I have to say just now.  Limited edition, by the very fact I have made a promise.  Keep your blog short.  Is the essence of what you see before you. The single work of a short-sighted man, with time on his hands and the mandate to kill time, without doing injury or harm to the essential character of the one called, Stoney Blogger.  Done now.

Amen.

 

light waves passing

LIGHT WAVES PASSING

 

So I am reading and I never expect to get it right, in the sense there is only one proper answer to the questions I ask.  So has to come down to this being a general inquiry for the mind that is obsessed with knowing it all, and by this time in the development of society and mankind, we are just beginning to find the breakthroughs that might give us enough longevity and experience to go beyond the guess-gesture.  This is not an original thought, as I saw it as a banner from a google search I made.   Too Much Technology and Not Enough Learning, source:  Edutopia.  

 

Start to concentrate on technology and learning, and realize this could be the paralyzing and debilitating effect I was hoping to avoid.  Realize I know so very little about my audience, and when I made the attempt to get to know you,  I made a lot of mistakes.  So now here I sit.  Realizing I just don’t know enough, and I don’t know you.  Comes down to the very point when I give up and turn back, and just leave.  And is what I see happening on one of the blog sites I often post to.

We all know, one is never enough.  More is better, and so we do not leave all our eggs in one basket.  So what does this have to do with the idea we all struggle to comprehend, where our best efforts should be placed?  Move over Shakespeare and admit that living with your significant other, or best mate, or a neighbor in the global environment, has gotten more difficult than ever before. 

 

Too much of anything can’t be good, so the experts recommend moderation.  Not sure I agree, and for most of my years have tried to learn and understand the ways of the working man.  I want things to work.  My relationships.  My time at work and I want it to be both productive and long lasting.  But then I realize, we are all temporary here.  What I want has to be put in perspective.  Important when I was just 20 and deciding a course to take.  School.  Work.  Military.  Church. 

And is the same with most of those who read this.  We made choices and it seemed automatic at the time.  Babies.  The Right Person to have a family with.  No family, just professional correspondence.  We made choices.  And now at every step of the way, we deal with the consequence.  We do.  We have.   Choices Made and Consequence.

 

Over the years I realize,  it comes down to you and I.  And if I don’t know myself and who I am and all those things that brought me in proximity to you, what is the chance or probability I will ever understand you and be so close, we stand side by side on the ground– zero-site, hoping for perfection in the things we say and do, together.  So what chance is there, that light waves are passing, and then they join to be at the point of seen significance.  Is there but one light, and we are all part of such circumstance and occurrence? 

Is a question, I am not going to give a lot of thought to, because I am new here, first time remembering and being conscious.  And if this happened before,  I am just unaware of that at the moment.  Is why I need you.  Is why I need friends and people. 

 

Need to see you and wave.  Need to cross the street and meet and greet.  Need to have this interaction clarified.  Need to have more information about all this.  Need to know you better.  And yet,  at the same time, it seems the light wave, is just that.  I nod and smile and keep moving.  No time to come to you, and get down to the significance of you and I as separate entities, needing to unite.

 

Simple as it seems  this is a situation that comes with such complexity and interference that we scarcely have time for each other.  I blog.  The audience is out there, but do we connect.  And if we do, what does that really mean?  Role playing and the light wave, nothing serious and we have just so much time.  Will I devote that time to you?  Light passing and so is time.  Where do we go from here. 

And that is when I realize That too much technology and not enough learning about the particulars of you and I, existing but not really together, has its downside for me.  Held apart by things we do not discuss, the space between us magnifies and grows.  And that is when I realize, it is never too late. I will blog.    Using words, I will extend myself.  Let you grasp as much of me as you have time for. 

 

And that is my solution to the question I dare not ask.  When do We Have Enough?  And am sure you want to clarify what I am asking of you.  Of course you do, but then its online, and not in the neighborhood and not just down the street.  And so we are left standing with obstacles between us and  like light waves passing in the great unknown, we are there as individuals in a universal setting,  seeking a meaningful connection. 

 

But only for a brief moment do we recognize this as fact, and then you are gone.  We move so fast.  It is over.  And yet, somewhere in the mind or body or consciousness, it registers.  We know.  We recognize each other.  Déjà vu.  What am I to you?  I wonder.

 

without further ado

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO

 

The title,  without further ado implies that we will proceed without continuing talk.  And it might be a small point, that we are using words on a screen, rather than face to face talking to get this point across to you.  Across the miles, and into my day, I choose to carry on this routine of blogging, and reaching out.  No reason to offer justification, and will not waste my time expanding on that thought.  We must and will, make contact.  The Aliens are coming.  Immigrants on our southern flanks, crossing over and become one of us. 

 

And so they have made that an election year issue.  Wondering as I often do, what happen in the next 5 years, after the election is over, will this enable me to, and then I compile a list of things I was to be co-dependent with.  Often the list is erased, before the garbage is taken out and disposed of.  Part of what has to be done, if I am to avoid the chatter which contains the waring, “Avoid.  This place is trashy.”  Not sure if I am talking about a real place, or an internet site, or some 3^rd world place that I must have a visa and passport to visit.  Life as I know has become most complicated, and without further ado,  I will write and tell you as much as I can, about this day and how I find myself in it.

 

There has to be a reason why I think you must know.  Why I bother you with all of this.  Maybe it all has to do with word choice,  with form and is it writing or is it talk.  Without further ado refers to getting on with it, without further talk.  Has nothing to do with the endless hours I spend at the keyboard, banging out The Next Great American Novel or my idea of it, which is a blog that details how I spend my morning, and all those people I pissed off, posting my thoughts and comments, just yesterday.  Ok,  Talk or Type.  Which is your preference and is not the point of all of this Further Ado Sailing, that we should get on with it. 

 

Get along.  Move forward.  Clear the decks and fuel the word machine.  Give us what we demand, or else.  Or else what?  And that is my concern just now.  We have a disagreement.  We agree to disagree and silence feels the space between us. “ So what?”  Tomorrow is another day, we might talk then.  But what if that doesn’t happen.  “What Then?”

When people stop talking, the end is near.  Without Further Ado, this could be you.  Wrapped in silence and no place to go.  The end of consciousness as we know it, and you need to ask, “Is that all there is?”  Bring all this up, because I think we can do better, if we have the time and energy.  As long as we are reading this, we have an option.  Why go the No-More-Talk-Route.  Why not,  talk to each other.  Word Choice and format should not matter.  We are intelligent beings, we should and will adapt, if not rather slowly.  Even that is a moot point, if we are not talking. 

 

So it is important to get on with it.  Spend time with each other.  Laugh and cry and play around with sheer non-sense.  Is okay to ask the wall, “What are you wearing?”  And to get back this echo-answer:  “Wall Paper, of course.”  No cosmetics or war paint for me.  “Be civil.”  And this is but one option we consider, while exchanging thoughts and views of how things should be.  Is why I say, “Without Further Ado, lets get on with it.”  Be nice.  Be Friendly.  Be Aware.  If we do this long enough,  I will fall in love.  With you.  With your words.  With this screen magic.  And if you don’t believe me,  just follow along.  It might happen.  If not with me, with others.  Follow along.  Just do it.  Without Further Ado.

JUST ONE MORE DAY

JUST ONE MORE DAY

You can’t write a blog and play a video game golf tournament at the same time.  Limits and obstacles and we must make choices.  If you want to, choose to be cynical and say, “Just One More Day.”   So now I look at it more closely.  I was predisposed to this being Sunday, and potentially a day of hope and promise.  Sanctuary time, and a place for the mind to go, to rest and be positive and be outside the scope of ordinary and daily practice.  Once a week, put things in G-D’s hands, and go on auto-pilot.  Is how it should be,  and for me to impress this on my mind, must stay away from google and headline banners and targeted ads. 

Oh, yes.  On Sunday, and there is still those out there, who want to get me. “ Get me.”   “Do you get me?”   “Just one more day.”  Does this mean it all has to get done today, Sunday, as this is my last day.  “Just one more.”  When this was typed, I wasn’t aware of the full meaning and scope of this phrase or title.  Even now, is a sense of faith.  It is still Sunday.  And the video game continues.  Where are my priorities?  G-D or Tiger Woods.   ?

 

I have a lead.  It is the final round.  Unless I have a panic attack, nobody will catch me.  Of course, its just one more day, and anything can happen.  But that is true, regardless.  So why paint the scene with streaks of dread, or read,  or red.  Word jargon and we will be judged on the final word.  “…repent.  Repent.  I didn’t know what that meant.”  Leonard Cohen lyrics.  Song sung in another time. 

 

Not today.  Not by me.   But it sticks in my mind, and trivial things often do.  And what are we going to do about it.  We have a lead.  Lead guitar.   Lead in the drinking water or solder.   Good voice.  Strong pipes.  And we could go on like this all day.  Then I realize.  “ Stick to the task.  Focus.  Finish one thing, and then go on to another.”  Seems like something a wise person would say.  Need my strength and need to have breakfast.  Refresh and Nourishment.  Words or Food.  Just One More Day.  What’s on the menu?

 

I need to finish this before the phone rings.  Word jargon and using your words, and saying it right.  Not sure there is certainty that there is one way to do this.  “Just One More Day.”  Should perhaps be, “Just another day.”  Hinting on the condition that this is all routine and ordinary.  Stop thinking in terms of finality and drama in the moment.  Take the day as it comes.  If it is, the last one you will experience, of course that will be noted. 

 

But instead,  all I want to do is finish this before the phone rings.  Want to enjoy Sunday and everything that is implied by that.  Day off.  Weekend.  In the company of loved ones and friends, or with the house dog, which could truly be a loved one and a friend.  Word specific and finding myself not wanting to go into details.  Take back what I said, if I could.  Just One More Day, and did I mention I missed congratulating you on your birthday, or special occasion.

And now I am done.  Need to venture out.  Dressed for the weather and for the event.  Nothing more that needs to be done.  Love what I am doing.  And that’s it.  Have a good day.   May peace be with you.   If indeed there was just one more day,  this is what I would say.  ´Peace be with you, one and all.”

 

if there is a reason

IF THERE IS A REASON

 

If there is a reason for the things we do, or what happens just down the street, I’d like to know.  Lately I have had my doubts, that chaos actually follows a script.  Want to be generous with my praise for the good things that happen, want to give credit where credit is due, but then I read between the lines, and see other things.  Can’t give a blind eye to the way things are, or if I do, some will score a win, figuring they got over on him.  Seems the administrator for government records, she had a name, but now she is gone, so why bother figuring the details out, including her name.  Records that were supposed to be private, have exposed over 21 million people or more, and who is the boss and who is responsible.  U.S. government.  It was their employees.

 

And its people.  So Now I look further.  Hacker World, and there is more loss and damage of priority records.  Has me thinking, the system is not safe.  And if I really knew the details, I suspect I would be clamoring for the resignation of the guy at the top.  Now, am afraid to name names.  But maybe somebody knows.  Who is responsible for U.S. government failed systems?  The top guy, and that is.  Ok its all speculation because we don’t have the facts.  Am I getting this right?

If there is a reason we don’t have all the facts, is it in my best interest to know.  Know how the system is failing us.  We the People.  Okay so occasionally life throws us a clunker.  We take a swing at defending life and limb and principal, but miss.  Miss the mark and left in the dark, and does it pay to seek the light of truth, when we are dealing with this new world of modern ways and technology.  Who is responsible when something breaks?  Or when chaos is just around the corner.  Not about somebody else, the focus is on me and you.  Its our records.  Now what?  Can we take a write-off and start over.  Makes me wonder, if there is a reason I don’t know what to do, in this situation.  Makes me wonder.

Weekend is here.  Time to put the work week aside.  Be generous with the things you hope to be and do.  Weekend.  Need time off for good behavior.  Wonder if the best is next to come, when I just got fired from a well paying job, because somebody has to be responsible for the system failure, and its not the guy above me.  So now I am gone, “Have a nice weekend.”  Your severance pay will be generous.  No worries.

 

And yet, just knowing something could happen, puts me in jeopardy.  Not sure how to substantiate this claim, as I do not have the facts.  And when it happens to you, it is too late.  Identity theft and you need a new social security card, and the person at the windows says, “We don’t do that.  Next.”

 

Becomes a formidable task when all we want to do, is protect my family and our  interests.  Identity theft and it has become serious.  And if there is a reason and the world is too complex to let me in on one of those dirty little secrets that truly affect me, should I just take a few days off, have some weekend fun, and come back on Monday, prepared to handle my business?  Makes me wonder.