Sunday, June 25, 2017

A Different Insanity





A Different Insanity






Not my first choice to start the day with conjecture or arguing about who said what to who.  Want my cup of coffee or tea, and a moment to sit and reflect.  Thoughts I had before going to bed last night:  “I should blog.  Has been a while.”  Then it came to me and to make sure it stayed at the top of my circulating thoughts file, I wrote it down.  A Different Insanity and was not sure how I would elaborate and expand this into a blog others would benefit or enjoy reading.  GSW and CIA and ABC’s of a world that has in many ways gone beyond what I am capable of dealing with.  Hence, am comfortable that this is somebody else’s event-filled calendar and life, and that I could rest on what got me here.  “Now stay retired.”  Is a voice I am hearing and I wonder if it is the means of modern technology and media display that puts thoughts in my head?



Remember when they were doing their best to get me to say,  “Yes,  I hear voices.”  Can’t remember all the things they asked of me, but finally my niece would say, “Enough.  We are going home.”  Turned out to be the family solution, and that might be:  “If it is something you can handle within the family or in-house, leave it in the closet, and certainly don’t discuss such things in public.  Family Issues and when I think about it,  that is one form of insanity that comes to mind, featured on the  Wayback Machine Database.  Insanity and what are we talking about, when we should go back to the old fashion way of dealing with such things.  In-house.  No strangers through the front door.  It is in the closet, leave it there.



Not sure who is putting these ideas in my head.  Albert Einstein.  Narcotics Anonymous.  The Organization Internet.  Insanity is repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results.
Doesn’t sound like a scientific doctor-based explanation.  Now reading that the definition of insanity is the most over-used cliché of all time and am hoping to find a way to climb out of the box or closet I find myself in.  Be careful  what you say, else the probable outcome will be some sort of official determination.  “Just plain crazy.  Lock them up.”  Mental health and cattle prod and in the beginning would hear about treatments that mentioned electricity and front lobotomy and asylum.  Beyond the family closet scheme, and think perhaps in a different time I would never be sitting before a computer, sharing these thoughts.  Instead, and we didn’t talk about it what the alternative treatment might be.  Leave it to the family, and do the best one can.

 

Tabaco and Opioids and alcohol.  Treatment for what ails you.  Insanity and in the old days that would be one way to say it.  Repeating the same mistakes and expecting different results.  No COPD.  NO death by liver failure.  Drugs and addiction.  Leaving me to think:  “Insanity is.”   And drawing a blank.  Is what happens when parents start with you, impressing in no uncertain terms,  “Children should be seen, but not heard.”  The doorway to silence is their teaching and imprint on you.  But now he is all grown up.  Has his own ways of doing things, and sits at a computer.  Writing this blog.  A different Insanity and he wants to clarify what that means to him.



Can’t do something over and over again and expect a different result.  That is insanity.  So going beyond what we did before and settling on the here and now and present moment solutions, he thinks he is looking at a different insanity, but is struggling to say exactly what the difference is.  How Stuff Works is a internet site that gives me some information about all of this.  Types of Insanity.  Break it down, but don’t get carried away, and certainly be careful what you say.  “Do you hear voices.”   “Have you ever thought to hurt self or others?”  “Do you drink or smoke?”   All leading up to somebody making a determination about you.  Insanity and this could be a variety of disorders.  Inside the mind, and am wondering now, “Yours or mine?”  Have to be alert to how stuff works and if by answering their questions, you reach a different insanity.



A different insanity and wonder if this is not but one person’s call for help.  “Don’t put me behind bars.  I may be affected by the world in front of me.  But please, Don’t Say I’m crazy.”  People and we come in all different sizes and with conditions we would perhaps rather not talk about.  Thinking I need help and support.  But then am unsure, where I would go to find something like this.  In a world where people at the top, wheel and deal and cajole, to get support for a healthcare bill that has grown less popular with more exposure.   Is what Grandmother and Grandfather said, “Put it in the closet.  Family and handle it in-house.”  Remain strong and be silent.  Insanity is, and this is what we will do to make sure it is not one of our greatest accomplishments.


The elders have spoken.  Best to keep negotiation about such things a big secret.  Behind closed doors, and then just pass the health care proposal.  Insanity is.  Hasn’t changed much since Grandfather’s time.  We have the internet.  And mass communications that put words in our mouth and in our head.  “Do you hear voices?”, and would bet that 99 % of the time, is just what it is.  No way this should happen, but it does.  Crazy people everywhere.  “Want to buy some dope?”  “light up but don’t stand in the doorway.”  “Let’s get a drink after work.”  And it happens.  Seems normal and is probably the different insanity that I am talking about.  Not sure.



Sanity and madness, and perhaps that is what this blog should be about.  1’s and O’s and is the code behind the scenes that makes sense on the screen.  New reality or just a spin off that combines old and new math techniques.  Lost in so many ways, the true meaning of things, am good to accept the idea of different personalities within the same body and mind.  The Silent Type and would that be Mr. O.  And then comes the necessary other:  Mr.  1.   1’s and 0’s and after that a combination of both that makes it happen in their world.  All a big mystery to me, but am old school and didn’t learn it the way it is  today.



Keep it simple.  1’s and 0’s.  sanity is one.  Madness is the other.  Other than that, operate each day with a clean slate.  White board.  1’s and 0’s.  No reason to inflict harm on self or others.  Recognize that all of this is just part of the human condition.  None of us are perfect.  Leave the insane discussion for another day.  Let others deal with healthcare and what is good for the society.  Have tea or coffee.  Be happy.  As somebody once said,  “this too will pass.”  Not sure if this has anything to do with me.  But am aware.  “Be careful when they ask,  “Do you hear voices.”  Best to not give them the alternative version.  “Don’t hear voices.  Just see 1’s and 0’s.  Sanity  and Madness side by side.”   Is what I see.  “Hear voice, not so much.  I seldom listen to the news.”  He smiles and leaves it like that.  Morning and he has finished his tea or coffee.  Ready for his day.  Blog written.  He is happy now.





1 comment:

  1. I start with a large cup of tea. It's too large and really I'd like a strong coffee, usually instant but we have run out.
    Thanks for talking about the voices. There are sweet voices I remember. Recently there was an orchestra of wind in tree sounds and then surrounded by 6 chirruping baby wrens.
    My daughter, a psychologist, asks me for financial advice which I give her but I am listening for voices. I think she thinks I'm fine. I AM.

    ReplyDelete