pastel facade

PASTEL FACADE

 


Am having a reaction to The Red Bubble in my day.  For me, is a life long thing, reactions to everything, positive or negatively-speaking.  Red Bubble and am moving away from the reminder of blood and gore and war.  Blood work, and I do hope you feel better, but now this blog is all about me, mostly.  Self-fish that way.  Big ocean.  Just me.  Lost in the idea of vivid colors, or at best just blending in.  Months ago it was summer.  Now its not, and I am on the move, looking for a little sun. 








And the airlines can help me with all that.  Winter vacation for old people.  Where do you want to be?  And I can answer that.  I want to be back in my youth, on a sandy beach on that blanket big enough for two and a little sand, if that what it takes to get you to look up and smile at me.  And so its revision time.  Tired of the war and news of war games.  Necessary perhaps, but not at this time for me.  So have changed and allowed the flow of mixed colors to create a Pastel Facade for me.  Something to enter and hide behind.  Perhaps.











I know what is going on, psychologically-speaking.  Valentine’s Day is nearing, and have given up wine and sweets and many of the traditional items that point towards romantic love.  But spend all my time loving you, even if you are not here, and won’t be.  On Valentine’s Day.  La Facade Pastel covers it for me.  Not even a greeting card in the mail, and must I mention that the Mail Service is deteriorating and poor service is what is happening now.  Want you to buy stamps online, and use modern means to communicate.  Save time and money, and its a dismal scene.  Government getting smaller and less efficient, but this is a blog about Valentine’s Day and romantic love, and everything else can be covered by La Facade Pastel.  Color me indifferent these days.  She is not coming.  Check is not in the mail.




Notably blue.  Pastel Hue.  What do you want from me?  What do I want, myself.  Not really a question, as the answer had been formulating ever since you went away.  Miss and I miss you.  Of course I do.  Its all about love, and its not just about one day.  February 14th and some celebrate.  As for me, I’m trippin.  Not sure where I will end up.  Evasion tactics and endless war.  Inside and Out.  



 


Mockery of all that we were about, standing there in the fading light, kissing.  I remember some of that.  Don’t remember the fireworks, nor the screams of panic.  Was calm, and cool and collected.  Even now, that is the case.  Old buildings and pastel facade help me displace the immediacy of it all.  You are gone.  That’s all I need to know.  Appear or Disappear.  The essence of a magic trick, and won’t say lasting love is sheer trickery, but sometimes when I need to collect my thoughts, move out of the heat and glaring sun, drink some water and calm down, I think.  Love is difficult at best.  Geesh.  I miss you.





Blue Note Jazz Club.  Pastel facade and intentionally blue, with a happy saxophone in the background.   Valentine’s Day.  You and I.  Forgot the date, but it must have been February 14.  But what was the year.  Who cares, I know it happened.  Let me seek pleasure in that moment.  Love the music that brings me close to you.  Tunes, both now and then.  Subtle and Revealing.  Not sure I ever thought, we had it all.  But in the jazz club we had fun.  Celebrating Life.  Smooth together and that’s how I see it, even now.  Crystalizing jazz, funk and Latin.  Life on an Aruba Beach. 




Headed that way now.  Not sure if I will get there.  Not sure if snow and misery and war will prevent me, from being there.  Pastel Facade helps me think differently, block out reality, and seek love.  All the time.  In real time.  Not just on Valentine’s Day.  But always, am in love with the idea that I was truly in love with you.  Missing that and you and well it happens.  One more set after midnight.  One more glass of water.  Tears perhaps, but probably not.  A stoic.  Well disciplined.  Hide.  That feeling behind a pastel facade, listen to the music and do well.  That is the message I send.  To myself, mostly. 


In love.  Still.  Keeping it real.  Trippin or on a trip.  It all blends together.  Throwback to yesterday.  Nothings changed.  Mirrored walls and pictures of you, dot my memory.  Cling to the smooth dance moves that brought me to you in the first instance.  Spacious and with endless possibility, back them, was a form of generous love.  You and I.  And so it is.  In the lounge, but staying away from drink specials.  Enjoying the colors of you and those around me.  Special aura.  That’s what love is.  Special  Colors.  Inside behind the pastel facade.  My blog for today.